Shanga, mfite imyaka 15. Natangiye kuzana ibimenyetso biranga ubwangavu. Ariko ngitangira kumera amabere, abo tubana batangiye kumbuza ibintu byinshi. Nasanze kuba umwangavu biteye isoni. Numva nifuza kongera kwibera umwana ariko ntibyankundira. Nkore iki? Ngira inama, nitwa Mukabalisa.

Mukabalisa urakoze cyane kubaza iki kibazo. Ubarije ba “Ni Nyampinga” batari bake. Ibyo uvuga ni byo koko, hari abakobwa bagera mu bwangavu nkawe bagatangira kugira ipfunwe. Ariko hari n’abandi usanga ahubwo bagira ishema. Byaba byiza abakobwa bageze mu bwangavu bakagira ishema. Ubwangavu ni ikintu kiza. Ni ikimenyetso cy’uko utangiye kuva mu bwana, ukerekeza ku kuba umuntu mukuru. Ubwangavu ni igihe gishimisha cyane. Igihe umukobwa akina n’abandi, akiga byinshi ndetse akagira n’inshuti zizakomeza kumubera inshuti yarakuze. Ariko reka ngufashe twibaze impamvu abakobwa iyo bageze mu bwangavu bagira ipfunwe aho kugira ishema.

Iyo usesenguye neza, usanga ibitera umukobwa kugira ipfunwe ari ibi ngibi:

• Kuba nta makuru afite ku mpinduka zigiye kumubaho, zikamutungura.
• Kuba afite amakuru atari yo, baramubeshye, hanyuma impinduka zatangira kumubaho, agasanga zitandukanye n’ibyo yabwiwe.
• Kuba hari ibintu bibi abantu bahuza na zimwe mu mpinduka ziba ku mukobwa mu gihe
• Kuba umukobwa yahubuka agakora ibintu bizamugiraho ingaruka igihe kinini, kubera amakuru adafite, agasobanukirwa yaramaze kubikora.

Naganiriye n’abantu batandukanye, maze bambwira ko ikintu abanyarwanda bafataga nabi cyane mu mpinduka ziba ku mukobwa mu bwangavu, ngo ari ukuba umukobwa ari mu mihango. Hari byinshi byaziraga kuri we ndetse bakemera ko hari ingaruka byatera kandi mu by’ukuri nta kibazo. Ingero:

• Umukobwa cyangwa umugore uri mu mihango:
• yaterura umwana w’uruhinja nta kibazo. Ntabwo yamuhumanya ngo azane ibiheri mu maso.
• yanyura mu myungu (ibihaza) nta kibazo kandi ntiyabora.
• yagera aho inka iri kubyara, kandi ikabyara neza.
• yagera aho bari kwenga kandi ibyo ntibyatuma bitema.
• Imihango ubwayo si umwanda, ahubwo uri mu mihango yigirira isuku.Ibindi bishobora gutera umwangavu ipfunwe ni uko ashobora kuzana ibiheri mu maso, akabona ntasa neza nka kera. Hari n’igihe amera amabere, akazagira ubunini burenze ubwo yatekerezaga. Ashobora no kubyibuha cyane mu gihe gito ntabikunde. Ibi byose bishobora gutera umwangavu kugira ipfunwe. Gusa, ntibikwiriye kumutera ipfunwe kuko ni ibisanzwe.

Ikindi navuga, ni uko umwangavu usanga yiyumva nk’umuntu mukuru, ariko ababyeyi be n’abo bava inda imwe n’abandi baturanyi, bagakomeza kumufata nk’umwana ku buryo ibitekerezo atanze badapfa kubyakira. Ibi na byo byatuma agira ipfunwe.

Nshuti yange, ibi byari bimwe mu bintu byatuma umukobwa ugeze mu bwangavu yiyumvamo ipfunwe aho kwiyumvamo ishema.

Ariko, ibiba bigiye kukubaho ni byiza. Uba ugomba gushaka amakuru ku muntu mukuru wizeye akagusobanurira neza. Iyo ufite ubumenyi, ndetse n’abagukikije bakagushyigikira mu bwangavu bwawe, ntakabuza nta pfunwe ugira uri mu bwangavu, ahubwo wumva ufite ishema ryo gukura.