There are times you have a friend who might ask you to do things you are not comfortable with. Other times your friend seems to want to change who you are, maybe because they want you to be like them. When this happens, it’s often difficult to know what to do, because you don’t want to hurt your friend. There are three things that could help you to manage these situations, and importantly keep your friendship.

• Know yourself and stay who you are.

Knowing what you value and believe in, your likes and dislikes will help you to understand what you have and don’t have in common with your friends. This will also help you know the limits of your friendship and when to say no to your friend in case they ask you something you don’t want to do.

• Learn how to say “No” in a positive way

Saying “no” to your friend doesn’t mean being harsh to them. You can simply do it by saying: “Thank you for the offer, however, it’s not possible for these reasons.” Telling your friend why you said no will help them accept your perspective and respect your response.

• Don’t wait until the last minute.

If your friend asks you to do something you are not okay with, let him/her know as soon as possible. When you take time to answer they might think you have accepted. For example, if he/she wants to go with you somewhere during class time, but you know it isn’t possible, say “no” right away and explain why.

Being friends with someone does not mean you have to be exactly like them. Everybody is unique, and the most important thing is knowing who you are, what you believe in, and being happy about it.